Why aren't you reading the actual post at www.ilikenoses.blogspot.com huh bitch? Fuck your mama.
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This post might read better with Tell Him by The Exciters playing. Here's a link if you're interested.

Do you remember that young couple you passed by at the park a while ago? Or, well maybe you don't. They kinda just blend in with everything else, don't they? They were cute, and who really cares if they're buried into their faces. Eskimo kisses are adorable, let the young ones do what they do while it lasts. When was the last time you held someone at a bench, just because? Enjoying the beautiful day, existing within a bubble of happiness.

They're probably having some really in depth conversation about a topic they won't remember in 2 days. She's probably saying something like "Macy's being real mean at work lately, she reminds me of all the adults on that one movie we just saw... What was it again?"

Which is probably followed by "Oh, you mean The Santa Clause? Wait, how does that even work? I was too drunk that night to remember what they were like.." and it goes on and eventually they look dead into each others eyes, slowly lean and do that cute thing you probably haven't done in a long time. Hey look, there you are, passing by. You were kinda far, it's no wonder you didn't notice. You should be glad though, you didn't wanna witness this.

It was intimate; a gentle parting of lips. That initial moment they had there, within the middle of the rest of the world, right before she sunk her tongue in an attempt to meet his. But she didn't. She'd been with him for 6 months and this was just not how he kissed. For starters, he never had his eyes spread open in fear during these ever intimate moments. And no, there was no serial killer with an ax standing behind her. He did realize, however, that he no longer had a tongue.

He shoved her off of the bench. A rude gesture to which she stood up and gave him a well deserved slap. Her hand then quickly made way to her chin, where she dusted off an inch long spider. And then picked one out from of under her lip. By now, her eyes were as wide as his.

And he was just, you know, laying face-down at the bench. Trying to empty the cavity of hundreds of carnivorous spiders who'd rapidly devoured his tongue. The same spiders that made his throat seem like it had moving hives. The same spiders who had nested in his stomach for months, and finally found their way back out to light.

Hey, the link is ilikenoses.blogspot.com so hurry and get there before I finish up inside your MOM. Maturity, bitch!
Sources here and here


  1. Don't take this the wrong way but what you just did is messed up man! (I went back and changed my original word!!)

    You ain't right!!! I am so glad I'm reading this at 1300 and not 0100 or I'd have nightmares - again! Oh My God! Heebie Jeebie! Heebie Jeebie! Shit, I'm never going to sleep tonight.

    And, what made it more messed up - the music timed out right when things started going bananas. Well done, D4, well done. I scared for life, but well done just the same. Ugh, I hate spiders.

    1. Profanity is welcome at the bog, Elsie. This is my own little recreational area, for shits and giggles.

      I'm glad the story was nice to you!

  2. I disappear for a couple of weeks and I come back to this? Awesome!


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